The Spirit Is Willing

It becomes more and more obvious with age that the body is not always in agreement with the spirit.  I see this in Simba every day.  Where she once burst through the doggie door and flashed across the yard to chase that squirrel, she now goes at a gentle lope.  Ears up, tail wagging all the way.  You can see the bright eagerness in her eyes.  But arthritis-laden joints and an aging body just won’t allow the transformation to the golden streak she once was. 

This was never so apparent as a couple of weeks ago when we went to help close up the cottage in NH.  In the past, the words, “Do you want to go to the lake?” were always met with a Happy Dance, an expression of pure joy.  This time she lay there, looking up at me and simply wagged her tail. 

Swimming after the ball was something she would do over and over tirelessly until recently.  Her preferred method was to launch herself off the dock.  She would race out and leap off without hesitation. 

This time was different.  Knowing the weakened condition of her legs, we tried to convince her to wade out into the water and swim after the ball.  Our old gal insisted on the dock; however, upon reaching the end of it, she stopped short.  She spent a good five minutes going back and forth, wanting to jump into the water only to find her back legs beginning to buckle when she tried.  We kept trying to convince her to come back to the beach and swim out from the shore.  She would have none of that.  It had to be off the dock.  She finally settled for a half-hearted “fall” into the water.  It broke my heart. 

After we had taken the dock in for the season she had no choice but to swim from the shore.  At first she was confused, looking for the dock, but she finally accepted it was gone.  She started out after the ball from shore, stopped to take a drink, and then completely forgot her original goal.  Pete had to swim out after the ball to finally jog her failing memory. 

I have come to the conclusion that getting old sucks, but it’s still better than the alternative.  I am glad to have my golden girl with me for as long as she can still glean some enjoyment out of life.  For as long as her spirit is willing, we will be there to help her carry on.